Useful Parent’s Guide to Surviving the Teen Years

Your son or daughter yesterday were obedient, good kids and suddenly became rude, harsh and wild? You start feeling like you can’t cope with your offspring and lose control over him or her? Yes, awkward age is a very difficult stage in the life of teenager and the whole family. How to build relationships and not to miss the child?

Try to take him or her as an adult

Many children in their teens try to prove to everyone that they are adults. They try to look like independent individuals. Therefore, teenagers try to behave like adults, using alcohol, cigarettes and spending nights at their friends.

If the child is rude, then you don’t need to bite him or her back. Also, don’t start scandals and morals, or carry out total control over them. Try to understand that he or she is already an adult, because in the end you also were at his age.

If your child wants to quickly become an adult, then instruct him or her to do something he or she hasn’t done before. Let him or her choose their own birthday present for someone from close relatives, make purchases in the online store, or cook dinner by himself.

Show interest

At the age between 13 and 16 years, teenagers start to form their own opinion, views and beliefs. Children want to join all discussions.

When this happens, you shouldn’t show your indifference and just your child that his choice and opinion don’t mean anything. Also, one doesn’t need to mock at his choice, thoughts and feelings.

It’s necessary to try to communicate with your child as much as possible, be interested in his or her friends, hobbies, ask his or her opinion or advice. You should make it clear to the adolescent that their life isn’t indifferent to you and that you consider him or her as an adult.

Don’t put pressure on him or her

Toeing the marks of adults for a teenager means to avow himself insufficiently adult and independent. This explains why any orders from parents are often not observed.

It isn’t necessary to completely subordinate your children, let alone punish him for failure. Also, don’t seek obedience by shouting. Don’t forget that he or she grows up, and even not every adult likes being in control of somebody.

When you need your child to do something for you, never use a commanding tone to express it. It’s necessary that your wish doesn’t sound like an order, but as a request, and don’t forget to explain the reason why it’s necessary. Let’s say, a teenager listens to music at full volume, ask him or her to low sound, and argue this request by saying that you are suffering from a headache.

Set the example

When you start reproaching your son or daughter for not being interested in anything you may get such a response: “Wait, what about you? What are your interests?” Partly, your child will be right, because adults must always be an example for their children.

Don’t spare all your time to caring for the child, while forgetting about your own hobbies and favorite amusements.

Tell them about your life at their age

Very often children may feel that you are too strict and faultless and therefore they believe that you may never be able to understand them. It’s difficult for your children to imagine that you also were young once and accomplished stupid acts.

More often tell funny stories from your teenage life, tell stories about your first love, how you clashed with your parents, how you felt, what you liked and hated.

If you want to survive your children’s awkward days and save a good and trusting relations with them, you need to arm yourself with great patience, love, and most importantly learn how to forgive. Remember that this period is passing. You can find more advice on how to properly tutor and raise your character on the It’s also a good option if you just want to find a partner for life and build a cohesive family.

10 Tips on How to Deal with Children Aggressiveness

We all can behave violently, there is no exception. Our aggression is provided by our instincts. It protects us and lets us survive. During our life, we learn to give our aggressiveness a publicly acceptable form. We can say that social adaptation takes place.

Most fathers and mothers encounter children’s hostility during certain periods of their lives. Usually they have no idea what to do when this situation appears. So, here are 10 tips that will help to deal with children’s violence.

1. Control your negative impulses or your children may become a bullies. Note, a child understands social life by watching how surrounding people behave.

2. Always support your children. One shouldn’t allow statements: “if you behave yourself such way, then I (we) won’t love you!”. You children should never feel offended. Also, you should not under any condition try to buy him or her with any gifts. Your children require the time to be given to them. Give them as much as they need. Respect your youngest family members, pay attention to his or her opinion. Give him or her enough freedom. Let him or her know that if they ask, you will be happy to help.

3. The system of punishments shouldn’t depend on your mood. It’s unacceptable that the same act yesterday didn’t cause any emotion, and today has led to severe punishment. You must praise your child publicly, and revile him or her only privately. Don’t punish your children publicly. It humiliates your children.

4. Openly praise your children every day. They are important part of our life, we all need compliments. Some people have no idea how important the kindness is. Reward your children for their obedience.

5. If the child screams, angers and grizzles, then cuddle and hug him or her. This serves to fulfill several chief functions. The child sees that you can softly endure the manifestations of his or her aggression, so he or she won’t lose your love. Also, it creates the ability to restrain aggressive impulses and learn to control anger.

6. Show the final ineffectiveness of such behavior. Explain that even if he achieves some self-profit, he or she is at risk of turning in to an outcast because no one will want to spend time with them. There is no way that someone will like this perspective. Also, explain your children that bad behavior leads to consequences and there is no exception. They must realize that they are going to be punished nevertheless.

7. Never be shy and afraid. Sometimes you may need help from professionals. Especially if you feel that there is no way to fix this. Professionals can effectively help your children to understand why this occurs.

8. Sport helps children to “blow down”, your children need to visit some sports section. The best thing for this it football or other outdoor games. The kid must necessarily have a place where he can run and scream as much as he or she wants.

9. There is no way to prevent the demonstration of aggressive behavior. Violence must be disgorged or it can extremely damage his or her life. Let your children learn how to express hostile emotions in an acceptable way. Explain him or her that anger is normal occurrence, but he or she mustn’t fight and offend other people. Instead he can try one of the cheerful ways:

· fight with pillows;

· beat a pillow;

· throw soft toys (on the floor, in the basket, on the sofa);

· crumple up a piece of paper;

· throw crumpled paper in a wall or in each other;

· tear the paper;

· draw the one whom he is angry about and crumple the paper;

· built the one whom he is angry about and crush the work.

Note: if you understand how to deal with it, aggression isn’t only a source of destructive behavior. Your need to teach the child to regulate it and apply it for peaceful needs.