Your son or daughter yesterday were obedient, good kids and suddenly became rude, harsh and wild? You start feeling like you can’t cope with your offspring and lose control over him or her? Yes, awkward age is a very difficult stage in the life of teenager and the whole family. How to build relationships and not to miss the child?
Try to take him or her as an adult
Many children in their teens try to prove to everyone that they are adults. They try to look like independent individuals. Therefore, teenagers try to behave like adults, using alcohol, cigarettes and spending nights at their friends.
If the child is rude, then you don’t need to bite him or her back. Also, don’t start scandals and morals, or carry out total control over them. Try to understand that he or she is already an adult, because in the end you also were at his age.
If your child wants to quickly become an adult, then instruct him or her to do something he or she hasn’t done before. Let him or her choose their own birthday present for someone from close relatives, make purchases in the online store, or cook dinner by himself.
At the age between 13 and 16 years, teenagers start to form their own opinion, views and beliefs. Children want to join all discussions.
When this happens, you shouldn’t show your indifference and just your child that his choice and opinion don’t mean anything. Also, one doesn’t need to mock at his choice, thoughts and feelings.
It’s necessary to try to communicate with your child as much as possible, be interested in his or her friends, hobbies, ask his or her opinion or advice. You should make it clear to the adolescent that their life isn’t indifferent to you and that you consider him or her as an adult.
Don’t put pressure on him or her
Toeing the marks of adults for a teenager means to avow himself insufficiently adult and independent. This explains why any orders from parents are often not observed.
It isn’t necessary to completely subordinate your children, let alone punish him for failure. Also, don’t seek obedience by shouting. Don’t forget that he or she grows up, and even not every adult likes being in control of somebody.
When you need your child to do something for you, never use a commanding tone to express it. It’s necessary that your wish doesn’t sound like an order, but as a request, and don’t forget to explain the reason why it’s necessary. Let’s say, a teenager listens to music at full volume, ask him or her to low sound, and argue this request by saying that you are suffering from a headache.
Set the example
When you start reproaching your son or daughter for not being interested in anything you may get such a response: “Wait, what about you? What are your interests?” Partly, your child will be right, because adults must always be an example for their children.
Don’t spare all your time to caring for the child, while forgetting about your own hobbies and favorite amusements.
Tell them about your life at their age
Very often children may feel that you are too strict and faultless and therefore they believe that you may never be able to understand them. It’s difficult for your children to imagine that you also were young once and accomplished stupid acts.
More often tell funny stories from your teenage life, tell stories about your first love, how you clashed with your parents, how you felt, what you liked and hated.
If you want to survive your children’s awkward days and save a good and trusting relations with them, you need to arm yourself with great patience, love, and most importantly learn how to forgive. Remember that this period is passing. You can find more advice on how to properly tutor and raise your character on the https://bebemur.com/blog. It’s also a good option if you just want to find a partner for life and build a cohesive family.